Year Five: A Letter

Dear Camden,

STOP the madness. I cannot believe that my little baby, the one that made me a mom, is now officially 5. FIVE! That's...ALL the fingers on one hand!

Camden has been up to a lot this past year. He started school, going to a Pre-K class that he LOVED. He was so disappointed to go to summer school that "wasn't the same". He is still a cuddler/hugger - giving good hugs at the most random times. He loves to be outside, "when the weather is so nice". He is a great helper, he has chores that he completes every week, he likes to help his dad mow the lawn, and he follows directions fairly well for a 5 year old. He likes to help feed the dog, change the trash, do any of the things I'm doing - especially if it comes to cooking. He can crack and egg like a pro!

He loves to swim, and this year he finally made the transition to swimming without floaties. He does great, and is a tan little fish. He gets to swim nearly every weekend, and some weeknights too over at grandma and grandpa's house. He still has sandy blonde hair, ridicuously long eye lashes, bright blue eyes and a tan that many girls would be jealous of. He is about 42 inches tall, and he weighs about 38 lbs, which is small compared to other kindergarteners in his class that are almost 6, and he's barely 5!

Speaking of growth - as he has continued to get older his toes are still turned in, causing his little hips to get out of alignment. God has blessed us with an amazing man of God and chiropractor who is helping us line his little body up right. We are adding little foot orthotics to his shoes to help his little feet turn out, and he is doing really well with them. We are believing in this miracle - that as he grows God will straighten him up!

He loves sleepovers at Grandma and Grandpa's, after church night on the weekends. He loves the sleepovers even more when his two cousins join him. He calls his cousin Kaitlyn who is 4 days older than him "my best girl". On some days, he will even ask if his brother can spend the night out with him because, "I really want him there".

He still prefers a morning sippy cup of milk in the morning, and a sippy of chocolate milk after school. He could live off of hot dogs and chili, I swear he might never get tired of that. He is a slow eater, but I hear that will change this year in Kindergarten, when they have about 15 minutes to eat their lunch. That will definitely be and adjustment, as he takes more time than my geriatric patients take to finish a meal. ;)

He sleeps well all night, and can still nap without issue. It's notable that during the school year he gets extra cranky by Friday's - because of staying up late and getting up when Mommy and Daddy leave for work, and there's just short "rest time" or "brain break" at school. On weekend though, he can still nap for an hour or two, especially on days when he has swam hard in the morning or been busy with the family.

His little relationship with the Lord is a precious one to see. He was helping his Dad mow the lawn not too long ago, and Dad asked him to push the mower that was turned off, to the front of the house. He started to push, quickly had trouble and stopped. He said outloud, "Hang on a second, I need to pray". He then bowed his head, said a silent prayer, and then looked up with a face of determination. Next thing I know, he's digging his toes into the grass as he's pushed forward with all of his little body weight to make that mower move, and by golly, he did it successfully, all while grining with accomplishment. It was one of the sweetest things to see! It wasn't that long ago that he was sick at school, and his teachers called to tell me they had changed his shirt that he got sick on, but were going to see how he did. I called and checked on him but he made it the whole day. When I picked him up he simply said "my tummy was hurting, but I prayed to God to help me feel better and then he made my tummy not hurt!". Faith like a child, so honest and pure.

Speaking of praying, we are working on praying about our whining and fit throwing. We are working on reminding him to stop and pray and ask for Jesus to help him calm down and ask respectfully for his wants or needs to be met - all without throwing a fit. He still has his good days and bad days at home, but overall, he's a great kid and is learning daily. He even told me the other day that he knew he could pray about his legs growing to be even lengths and that "God was going to fix it". Amen, little man; you definitely got this!

He is working on memorizing his first Bible verse, and pretty much has it down pat. Proverbs 12:22 is the verse. It was given to him at Gymnastics class and we talk about it as often as possible, and we repeat it in the car so he has it down pat.

Gymnastics is another new thing for him. He has so much energy, yet he could sit inside and watch his favorite TV show "Paw Patrol" for the entire night if we let him. So, we enrolled him in a gymnastics class for now. I think it's been good at teaching him to listen and follow directs, and in a large group setting. This will hopefully be something he will enjoy doing, and maybe he will want to try other sports and activities as we go on. He definitely loves swimming and has been asking about taking more swimming classes. We will see what develops over the next year for sure!

He's a smart little guy, always able to tell me different facts about things, and he is constantly learning. He still has some difficulty with speech, 'chip' and 'ship' tend to sound the same when he pronounces them, as do 'shoes' and chews'. Those darn "ch" sounds! Another thing is "think". It always comes out as "fink". I love it. And he told us that his grandparents recently took a vacation to "Alasaka" which - I didn't even WANT to correct him.

And oh, this little boy as a big brother. It is just heart melting. There are times when gets frustrated and pushes his brother, or takes a toy away from him, but you can tell he immediately knows it's wrong. As soon as Caysen starts to cry, he will be hugging him, apologizing to him and trying to get him to be quiet - and hurry! - before Mom and Dad hear! ;)

But in all seriousness, he is the BEST big brother. He is incredibly patient, he likes to teach him how to do things and get Caysen to follow his lead. He will pat him ever so gently on the head and talk to him, while Caysen "mm-hmm's" and nods in agreement with whatever he is talking about. He understands what it means to take turns, who goes first, who gets to watch a show and he is sure to make sure Caysen gets what he wants. Often times he will speak up for his brother, as Caysen will point to something and only Camden will see it, so Camden will speak up for him. He knows exactly what Caysen wants and is one of the best at reading Caysen's speech and motions! He is SO good at taking care of his brother! He will give him rides on his toys around the house, makes sure he has his blankie, and will always share a bite of whatever he is eating. Their relationship is really a sweet one to see. I pray that Camden will always be a great protector for his little brother.

Camden, I hope you know how proud we are of you as parents. You are smart, kind, honest and inquisitive. You have a tender heart, a beautiful faith, and a loving little soul. We can't wait to see what is in store for you, to continue to watch you grow, and to enjoy time with you while we have it. You are a blessing in more ways than can be counted, and we can't wait to see the ways God will use you in your lifetime. We pray you continue to deepen your faith and share with others, and allow God to mold you into the sweet young boy you are becoming!

We love you to the moon and back,

Mommy

On Writing

Well hello there, it's been a while hasn't it?



Life has been so extremely busy, that I lost the chance and time to write. I didn't write Caysen an 18 month letter (mom fail), and I haven't been using my outlet of writing for myself, for my kids, for anyone to remember our journey.



Sometimes you just have to be in the mood to write. Sometimes, there just isn't enough time in the world, to sit down and say what you want to say. The words you want to write that you feel inside just don't fall out onto the keyboard the way you like or hear in your head.



I have written lots of letters, summaries, stories for both boys, our families struggles, all on this little old blog. Usually they are fairly easy to write, to tell and to express.



But a few weeks ago, I was given the beautiful opportunity to write for my friend. The chance to speak at her funeral was one that I knew I wanted to do, no question. The hard part? The hard part is the writing. How does one, with a heart so incredibly full of love and words and adjectives, summarize the best friend they've had into a short little speech that explains what her life meant to you and your family? How is that even remotely possible?



It wasn't an easy thing to do. I started over many different times. Deciding what to say that could adequately explain what she meant. I think I did a good job, yes. But I think with more time to heal, more time to deal with emotions, I could come up with a novel.



As I sit here while I type this, my sweet little half of a heart youngest son, Caysen, sits in my lap. He lets me play with his extremely cold, blue hand and I kiss his hair, he looks at me with his yogurt stained face, watching the tears slide down my cheek, and he tries to understand what that means. He doesn't understand tears, and searches my face for what I'm feeling. And what I'm feeling is that I still can't believe the journey that our family has been on.



The very journey that Andi played a HUGE role in, and that I will forever be grateful.



The hardest part to accept - is that she is no longer here. I can accept and know that she is safe, healthy, not in pain, hearing without hearing aids, and will be waiting for us in Heaven when we get there.  I feel that she was saved from something worse, more than we could ever think or know because we aren't God himself, and only he truly knows. I know that God took her because that was the best option for her.



But, the hard part is that she IS NOT HERE. She isn't here to watch my boys grow. To see Caysen get big, after all she did for him. To know the role she played. She is not here to talk me down from the proverbial medical ledge with a corny joke or funny story; when I'm stressed out from germs and lab results and upcoming heart caths and open heart surgeries. She isn't here to continue doctoring, to finish what she started. To finish what she had such an amazing drive and determination to complete - despite having every POSSIBLE and potential thing she could have to make things more difficult. (hello - have you ever met a deaf doctor - that was still a total bad ass? Have you ever met someone living across the country from her husband and still one of the bubbliest and funnest people you have ever met?). Yeah, didn't think so. Because despite the odds stacked against her, it made her more determined, more confident that she was doing what she was supposed to be doing.



That is such an admirable thing. To know, without a doubt, despite the troubles and hardships, that God has put kids and medicine on your heart to do, despite every road block. I pray when God speaks to me that I will always be so obedient.



A wise friend told me, which knocked the wind out of me -- but she said that she would never, ever consider bringing Andi back and taking her out of the grasp of our Lord and Savior. She said she couldn't be that selfish. The more I think about it? So true. When we are in His presence, it will be such a powerful thing, so awe inspiring, that we won't even be able to stand upright. We will fall to our knees as His greatness renders us speechless. How could I take her away from that? What a great and beautiful thing, that she is up there happy, healed, whole, with all of the loved ones who went before her, patients she cared for, and her grandmother that she spoke so highly of.



I think about her often. I think about her husband and family. I know that if I am hurting, they are hurting a thousand times over. I pray they find peace in the Lord, their Savior. I pray they know, they see, His glory and his goodness. I pray that they turn to Him, as there is nothing, NOTHING, Andi would want more, than to spend an eternity in heaven with her family and loved ones.



It doesn't take away from how hard it hurts. Tonight, at bedtime, Camden and I were saying his prayers. He prayed for Andi and her family, and said "Please help them to not be sad and to not miss Andi while she is in heaven". Then he turned to me and asked me "Mom, were you Andi's friend?" I answered yes, and he did something he never had before - He prayed "Please help Andi to not miss Mom too much, and for Mom to not miss Andi". He was hugging me in the same way Andi would hug me, standing high enough so I could hear his heart. I always took comfort in hearing her heart beat, strong and powerful. I would always pray that Caysen's would sound as strong as hers. But at the same time, it was all so bittersweet.  I realized I don't get to listen to her heart anymore. Physically or emotionally. I miss physically hearing her heart. I miss knowing what's on her heart. I miss that simple comfort.



But because of her, I have THREE hearts in my family to listen to. To savor. To love on with my heart. Like I have said before,  she made our family whole.



We both said, and I even have it in her handwriting, that God knew what He was doing when that pharmacy messed things up. Him bringing us together was a gift in more ways than we could ever count. Thank you, God. For your goodness you bring to our lives and allowing this angel into ours.



"You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world". 1 John 4:4

Dear Pump: A Letter

Dear Faithful Medela Pump,

This milk bar is officially closing. 

It's bittersweet, really.

Unless there is some large change of plans in our family planning, we are likely at our child stopping point. I was always open to three, but Caysen has been quite the doozy. I won't say that I wouldn't ever want others, but at this point I'm just relishing in Caysen and all that he is. I am slightly mourning the fact that my breastfeeding journeys were never what I had determined they were going to be.

As you may know, my breastfeeding journey with Camden wasn't quite what I had prepared for. He nursed, but wasn't so great at it. His latch was weak, and he was the SLOWEST eater (and still is to this very day), which wasn't kosher for pumping or returning back to work after 11 weeks. Once I did return to work, drinking from the tap eventually ended, and it was a relationship with the pump and I, and I managed to exclusively pump until he was 13 months old. I didn't mind it, doing what is best for my child is of utmost importance, and it was something I wanted to do.

With Caysen, I was even more determined before his birth. I made sure my milk came in as soon as I could get it to, supplementing, pumping in the hospital - despite the fact that my newborn spent the first 12 hours in the newborn nursery. I had read up on breastfeeding, gotten ideas and advice. I made sure to meet with lactation consultants in the hospital after he was born, getting all the assistance I needed from holds, to how he was latching. He was showing more progress than his brother, but I still used a SNS to help encourage him. I was armed and ready and excited for the journey.

Things came crashing down on day three, and I did good to even remember to pump that day and thereafter. I kept going at the prompting and encouragement of some NICU nurses and family members. They made sure I was drinking my water, friends brought me lactation cookies, and I trudged along. 

I kept having horrible thoughts cross my mind, "if he dies and I'm still pumping milk, will I be able to handle that?", "why pump if he can't even be fed?". I wasn't sure what I was doing, I just knew that I had nothing else to do while sitting in that NICU room the first few weeks and crying. Might as well make the best of it, right?

As my hormones leveled and I became clearer headed, I began to have a sense of determination. There lay my baby, covered in wires and tubes and unable to be held, but there is ONE thing I can control, and it's what he eats, when he gets to eat. And I can give him what I feel is best.  I timed things like clockwork, pumping every three hours, setting an alarm to wake up at home because I didn't have a baby to wake me. I was going to do this, and it was going to be what he needed.

Come January, at 6 months old and after lots of extremely bloody stools, multiple inpatient hospitalizations and one GI scope, we had the diagnosis of milk protein allergy. This meant formula. All that hard work, and they wanted me to do formula? 

Nope. I allowed it for two weeks while I went dairy and soy free to accommodate him. I didn't make it that far, throw out that much stored dairy filled breast milk to just stop now. I remained diary and soy free for 4 months, and have been dairy free for almost nine. It is one of the single most hardest diets I have ever done, having to read ALL the labels, not eat at certain restaurants while the rest of the family chows down. It has taken more self control that I ever realized possible, but you know what? 

I wasn't going to quit. I wasn't going to stop, not because of some dietary restriction. I was determined to give him what was best, he already had so much difficulty with GI and digestion issues, I wasn't going to change my mind. I was one determined Mommy. Every three hours, hooking myself up to that darned pump, forgoing sleep for the last almost 14 months to do what I felt was the best for him. He's a little fighter and deserved as much help as I could give him. 

It's come to a time where he can tolerate soy formula, and after almost 14 months, it's time to put the pump down. Caysen is growing beautifully, and his diet is consisting more of foods and not just milk. 

Throughout this terrifying and scary journey I would hear things like, "how do you do it?" and "You are so strong". The truth is, I'm not that strong. You just do what you do, when you feel like there is no other choice. I took it day by day, hour by hour. I had no control in most anything, but that. THAT was something I could control, and once I decided to, you couldn't stop me. It was a first big step in continuing to move forward. I could pump for him. I could wake up each day with my baby in a hospital. I could make it another day, another week, another month. It was the first step in the journey to realizing what I CAN do.

I hate you Medela pump. And yet, I love you Medela pump. So much of my time and family is tangled up in the tubing of that pump, but it's what made feeding my son's possible. You got me through NICU and PICU stays, two open heart surgeries, and countless nights alone without a baby at home. In those moments that I would wake up in the middle of the night to pump, I would use it to pray for my baby still in the hospital, in the care of nurses, before calling for a middle of the night update if I could possibly stay awake. You got me through physical and emotional pain, and to no longer have regularly scheduled meetings is, like I said, bittersweet. 

Thank you pump, for allowing me to do what I felt convicted in my heart was best for my boys and family. Thank you for allowing me to still feed my babies breastmilk. Thank you for always being there, accountable, steady. Thank you for starting me on the journey of realizing what decisions I can control, and helping me through the difficult times. Without you, this journey would have been completely different.

Signed, 

One determined pumping Mom

Camden, Three Years. A Letter.

Wow. Three years? Is that even remotely possible?

You have changed so much this year. You are smart, spunky, string willed and so very sweet.

We spent much of the past year preparing your two year old self for your biggest life change yet - adding a brother. We talked about it so often that I think you were truly ready. We prayed for him nightly, and we would talk about sharing toys with him and giving him your old room. Now that he has spent the first of his life at the hospital, I'm not sure how much of it you "get". But you will ask to hold him. We don't push you, we wait until you ask. And when it does happen it's pretty heart melting! I can't wait to really see the two of you together. 

It's amazing how much you pick up these days. You are too smart for your own good. You have been spending extra time with your grandparents, whch has resulted in you complaining of your back hurting. You told your daddy the other day you were "going to go have coffee with mom and dad", which is what your grandma does on weekdays before work.  It goes to show you are listening when we don't think you are!

You talk SO SO much. You are adorable when talking, you can't say your Ls or your Vs well, but we are getting there! You love visiting brother in the hospital, and you love spending time with your cousins. 

You are wearing size 2T an 3T, despite the 3Ts being a little baggy. We finally got you to wear flip flops this summer. We have noticed your size 6 shoes are getting tight. You still love pouches, and are mostly potty trained. You told us not too long ago that you are afraid to poop on the potty. Here's to hoping that doesn't last too long! 

You are a good sleeper, and you still don't leave your bed without calling us to come get you. Despite having your world turned upside down with brother in the hospital, you have adjusted fairly well to the new routine, and can still nap with the best of 'em. 

You love practicing your flash cards with daddy, playing in your sandbox an demanding you get your way. 

Camden, you are still our first little blessing, the one who made us parents. The one who teaches us day by day more than we could have expected. We are so proud of you, and so thankful that God lent you to us. If there is anything I want you to get out of this broken world, it's just how great our God is, and how much he takes care of us. That has been shown to us so much lately, but we know you are too young to really remember or understand it. 

Continue learning, growing and being a silly little boy that you are. You are our joy, our excitement in the morning, our heart, our little snow cone lover. We are so proud that we have the honor of being your parents!

Last Preggo Update

I can't even begin to describe how crazy life has gotten lately. Let me backtrack to where I left off.

I got a spinal tap on Tuesday June 18th. After another episode of increased blurriness and brightness in my vision - my vision decreased to 20/70 in my L eye and to 20/40 in my right. They could only assume that the pressures in my brain had gone up and wanted a lumbar puncture ASAP. So, they told me they would get me in - if not my neurologist would get me in himself in the ER. Well, they couldn't get me on the schedule, so he met me at the ER and performed the spinal tap on me himself.

He said he expected pressures to be in the upper 20s, normal range is 10-20. He had to stick me twice, first needle was too small and didn't produce the fluid results. Second needle worked. Ouch. And then pressures were 12. Stumped my neuro. He drained enough cerebral spinal fluid to create a new me.  He pulled out his little black book of neurology, ordered a laundry list of lab work to check for bacterial infection. He ordered things like toxoplasmosis, cat scratch fever, all kinds of crazy stuff. 

I woke up Wednesday and went to work. Before long I couldn't sit up right without my neck stiffening, my head pounding and vomiting. I went home and rested. That day, Dean McGee Eye Institute called and wanted to set up an appointment for that day. They were able to fit me in on Thursday and I found a driver (my mom) who could take me since I still could not sit upright. 

Thursday we drove to okc. I rode in the back, of course that's not safe, but I had no other choice. Arrived and spent most of the exam laying in my side in an upright chair. The doctor there was amazing and came to the conclusion that I was losing lots of color and vision but he believed 80 percent chance it would return. He diagnosed it optic neuritis and said it was either brought on by pregnancy hormones or was auto immune that was brought out instead of suppressed by pregnancy. I continued to be miserable from headaches. 

Woke up early Friday and headed back to the ER right after shift change. They got me in right away where I requested an epidural blood patch to fix the headaches. They wavered a bit but had no other treatment options so finally agreed. An epidural blood patch is where they draw blood from your arm and the. Immediately out it in your epidural space to help "patch" the holes and normalize pressures in your brain. Immediate relief. I spent the rest of my weekend resting and gimping round. Since my back had been through a lot and I was 38 weeks pregnant I was pretty stiff and sore. 

My OB appointment was that Monday. I went in and talked to my OB, and told him everything that had gone on and how the vision issues were in fact continuing to get worse and were pregnancy related. He wanted to do an induction that night! After talking with him we managed to to arrange an induction starting Wednesday night. I went back to work and the more I thought about it, and knowing I wasn't dilated or effaced at all, and he was still way up in the rafters, I decided to just request a c section for Thursday. I mean, I had already been through do much that past week and my back was still killing me, I just wanted it to be less stress on everyone. 

I worked Tuesday and then started my leave in Wednesday. Camden and I had a special day together, he came with me to my pre op appointment at the hospital and we did east he wanted to do which was go to chicken fil a and play and go swimming. We had a good time, stayed up past nap, took a nap together and snuggled. It was fantastic. 

Little did I know the end of my week and the beginning of the next were going to be a life changer in the most unexpected way...

Recently...

My boy. He was blowing dandelions and got it in his mouth! Not too thrilled about it either!

His favorite thing to do is "blow blow" with dad. He will talk about it for days and days!

My boys. With another boy that will be here soon to love on!

Lately.

Keeping busy.

I love experiencing things with this bunny.

He's getting so big!

 I took these using my makeshift studio.

Turned out pretty good with help of husband.

All done with natural light!

His favorite thing.

Tire swing.

:)

Green Party!!

For St Patricks Day Camden's class at school had a Green Party. They ate all green foods and even wore green! Camden was in charge of bringing the green Jello! Here are a few pictures of the party..

Things I don't want to forget...

...Your Daddy and I taking you to Chick Fil A to play, and you climb all the way to the top of the enclosed tower - look out the window and smile and say "Hi Mommy Daddy!"  and you wave until we wave back. You smoosh your face up against the plexi glass and yell "I Love you Mommy Daddy!" before running off to go down the slide or play up in the maze of tunnels. The other parents in the room smile and "awww" and say "well, that was sweet".

 

...Giving you a haircut lately. You would think we were pulling your teeth one by one with no anesthetic. You cry and bawl, so bad that one time there was snot and drool everywhere. "I don't want a hair cut either" and you'll beg ever so pitifully, "I want down, please!". Most recently it went a little better, Mommy took the reins and she likes to think she was a little gentler on your head than Daddy is. We went shorter than I would have liked, but it needed to be done to even out the mess that was the previous haircut. And shorter than I like because you age at least three years when you get your hair cut, and something about shorter makes this Mommy's heart flutter. You couldn't get in the shower fast enough, you sure hate having hair on you. Afterwards we were sure to praise you for getting your hair cut like Daddy and teling you how handsome you looked. We even would have you touch your head and remark "Ooh, look how soft it is!"

 

...Standing on the bathroom counter and and patting Daddy's chin/face stubble and asking "Daddy, you have an owwie?". Once we told you what it was, you now remind Daddy when it's time to shave. So cute.

 

...Loving playing hide and go seek. Daddy will hide at night when it's dark and you will insist on getting your Mickey Mouse Flashlight and we will use it to look in every.single.room. You will scream with delight when Daddy scares you, then you will ask "Lets do it again Daddy".

 

...Crying because you took your big boy underwear off, and alternately crying because you don't have your diaper on. It's like you can't decide if you want to be a big boy or like you say all too frequently, "No, I too small".

 

...Singing your ABCs and always leaving out M and N. And saying "Now I my ABCs, next time won't you sing with me" and always leaving out the "know" part of that line.

 

...Singing Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and always starting it with and A from the ABCs. Then completely botching the lyrics, but oh-so adorably.

 

...Always ending a sentence with ..."right, Mom?".

...The way you bring up crocodiles multiple times a day. You are fascinated by them! 

 

...Demanding to do things " Allll myself". Like zip your coat. Buckle yourself in your car seat. The list goes on and on.

...The fact that you can tell the difference between your right and left hand. Such a smart little kid, at only 2.5! 

We love watching you grow and change each day, stay sweet little man!

Parenting 101...

There is nothing quite like a boost to your parenting self esteem. You wonder if you are doing it right, if you are giving too many options to your toddler, or if you are gently steering them the way they need to go. It's the hope every parent has, that you are guiding them properly and molding them into behaved young people.

It's definitely challenging with a two point five year old.

Every morning before I drop off Camden at school he gets to play on my phone for five minutes before I leave him. He's the most popular kid around, his friends get excited when he arrives and they crowd around to either watch him play Mickey, game, or do a puzzle.

The other day he was a bit of a mess. He wanted to sit on my lap to watch, which was a little out of the norm. I obliged, and he seemed to get whinier from there. He is normally really good about obeying and turning the phone off when it's time for Mommy to go. But that day he wanted to throw a fit, flailing his body around and hollering, pushing his peers and causing a ruckus. I had to pick him up and hold him so he would look me in the eye. As he lay there with tears running out of the corners of his eyes, begging to watch Mickey Mouse, I had to be firm with making him turn it off. I told him that he was not allowed to play on the phone with that kind of behavior. He did turn it off, but continued to cry and fuss. I had to hold him and discuss how he needed to obey to play on the 'puters (his favorite thing at school) and if he didn't obey he wasn't going to get to play. He slowed his crying to hear me tell him he would lose a privilege, and then I told him he needed to tell me "sorry". So he says in his adorably pitiful voice, "I sorry Momma". So to make sure he's comprehending what I am asking him to apologize for, I ask him to tell me what he's sorry for. He responds with an equally as pitiful, "for throwing fits".

At that point he had slowed on his crying but then started to fuss again about "not wanting to play with his friends". At that point he had to option to sit on the couch by himself without the phone, or to go play with his friends. He chose to lay on the couch. I promised him that if he obeyed his teachers and helped clean up breakfast at school he could play on the computer. (After all, those are the rules of the room). He was able to be reasoned with at this point, less tearful and seemed to understand what I was saying. He answered me in a tearful and higher pitched tone with an inflection at the end of his one word answer, "okayyy". I told him I loved him and asked for a kiss.

As I was preparing to walk out the door, one of the teachers at school said, "Courtney, do you want to teach a parenting class? We've got some parents that could use that sort of information. Or some kids that just need to be parented in the first place".

Whoa. Holy compliment!

Did that really just happen? Its definitely a boost to my parenting self esteem when I hear a comment like that. After having all of the morning staff members sit and watch me parent my kid, it's good to know that they felt that I had handled it appropriately.

I left daycare that morning with a confident feeling about my abilities. Not only from that compliment, but from the way I was able to calm C, to get him to listen and apologize, and the way he seemed like he was able to hear what I was saying. He still wasn't completely done being upset or fussing, but we made some baby steps of progress.

Now, if these little lessons in obeying would start to sink in for good...

;)

2.5 or 30 months

How is it possible that you are halfway to THREE?? Talk about mind blowing. You are SO big now!

You got a haircut not too long ago, and that short hair made you look COMPLETELY grown up. You just seemed to grow an inch with that haircut, looking taller and thinner. You are talking so much, you are so big! You are now 28 lbs, walking and talking and learning every day.

 

You are learning more and more about self time outs. You are pretty good at throwing fits, but we are able to tell you to go to your room and not come out until you are calm. You usually will walk into your room, shut the door behind yourself, cry and then come out with a better attitude. You tend to spend less time in there at night because it's dark. ;) You are having trouble learning to control your frustrations and understanding what we mean when we say "if you obey and do this, you get this". We know you don't understand that reasoning, or that by obeying things will just be easier in the end. But if we keep at it, hopefully one day it will click.

 

You are right on track clothes wise - you are wearing size five diapers, size 5.5 to 6 shoe, and wearing 2T clothes and pants. You can still fit into some smaller 24 month things. Depite only wearing a 2T - you are still just seem like you are enormous. We walked into your room to wake you up a few weeks ago and we both stared in awe at how much space you took up in your toddler bed. You are so tall and long, it is just amazing. (since I wrote that, you have transitioned to your "new" room, and love your new queen sized big boy bed! The plus side about a bed so big is that you look small again!)

 

You normally go to bed around 815 and we wake you up on weekdays around 545 and nap 2 hours a day. On the weekends you will go to bed later and sleep in, but it's still not much more than the 9-10 hours. You will, however, take a three hour nap on the weekends if we let you.

 

You are pretty good about going on the potty when we put you up there. You go in the mornings and in the evenings before bed and on the weekends before and after nap. You still don't really tell us when you need to go, or when you need to be changed. We are still working on that but haven't decided to push you on it just yet. You will go sometimes at school and lately your Grandpa will promise you treats after school if you go on the potty during the day.  You are pretty cute when you have success on the potty, you will sit there and clap your hands and excitedly cheer for yourself saying "Yay! I did it!".

 

Oh eating, eating. You are SUCH a picky eater. You must get this from your picky eating father. If you had it your way, you would still eat just baby food. In fact, more often than not when you refuse the food we are eating we offer you a pouch and you will gobble it down. At least you are still getting your fruits and veggies, but boy do you have to be so darn picky?! You will eat fruits without an issue but seem to still have texture issues. Things that you loved previously you aren't as much of a fan now. Like mashed potatoes, or beans, noodles or even corn. That used to be all we could get you to eat, now you quickly turn up your nose. You will eat almost any and every option of pouches. Whatever keeps your little belly full! Your favorite snacks are Mommy's cheerios - peanut butter and strawberry yogurt burst, chips and puffs. You are still a big fan of strawberries - fresh or freeze dried, and could probably eat those for every meal. We have decided this year to grow extra strawberries in our garden because last year they never even made it inside before you would gobble them down.

 

You love to play hide and seek, chase your daddy in circles around the house and read books. You are addicted to Mickey Mouse and Bubble Guppies. You enjoy playing outside in your playhouse and your Daddy just added a chalkboard inside that you love to draw on.

 

You LOVE to count and are exceptionally good at it. You can count to fifteen and sometimes higher. You recognize numbers and can match them to the amount - (like if there are five balloons you can pick the number 5 that goes with it). You have your own tape measure that Daddy bought you after you loved your 2 dollar toy one from Toys R Us this Christmas. You carry it around and you and Daddy count on it all the time. We are still working on letters and your ABC's, but we are making quite a bit of progress, You can now recognize a good 15 of them or so. You are also really good at shapes and naming them. When we ask you to draw them you usually draw a pretty impressive line. ;)

 

You are so cute these days, following directions. Your Daddy will tell you to go find me and tell me something. Half the time you won't remember what you are supposed to say and will get distracted by what I am doing - like collecting hangers to go back to the laundry room. But on Valentine's Day before we left the house, you ran to tell me "Happy Valentine's Day!" And it was just precious. Just heart melting. And what was so cute was that you ran it so close together it was hard to understand, and I asked you to repeat it and it was a no go as you ran back off to find your Daddy.

 

Your manners are one of the sweetest things about you. We will get you more of something and you will say "Thank you Mommy" or "Thank you Daddy" and it's just adorable. We love that you are getting so good at these, and you are even able to be semi pleasant when you DON'T get your way. You'll ask for something 'please' and then if the answer is 'no' or 'in a minute', you'll answer in your sweet little voice "oooohhhhhhkaayyy" and take it as it is. I wish this was the case all the time, but it sure isn't. You're still learning little one! When you don't get your way, you will hunch over at your shoulders, slump your entire body posture, let your arms hang and proceed to whimper like a puppy. Come to think of it, this is something I need to get on video! ;)

You had your first trip to the Aquarium and you loved it. You touched sting rays and saw all kinds of cool fish. You had a blast, and we were so lucky to get to go for free with our cousins!

You also got to meet your newest cousin, and you were just so sweet with her. It makes me so excited to get a glimpse of the kind of big brother you will be!

We get so much out of watching you grow and learn each day. It's hard to put into words just how much you mean to us, but you are the light of our lives little boy, and we can't wait for what is to come!

Love you to the moon and back!

Mommy

Valentines for class

Camden had his Valentine's party the other day at school. He has been singing his RED song so much that some times he won't sleep that he's so busy singing! It's cute.

The party at school was all red themed, eating things like strawberries, apples, and even pepperonis.

I made Valentines this year that were not candy related, they were little bottles of bubbles for his classmates.

Then for his teachers I bought boxes of brownies and some spatulas and tied them up with twine and a cute little card that said "shooting for brownie points".

It wasn't too much work to make, and they turned out pretty cute. I bought these bubbles on clearance at the end of summer last year, that's how long I have been planning to do these valentines for his classmates!! Glad I was finally able to put it to use. Now, I suppose it's time to start planning for next year!

Sleepy Mcsleeperson

Camden has been battling a cough the past few days and it has caused sleep issues like waking up early. The last few nights he has also fought going to bed, which resulted in this happening this morning. That would be someone passed out in his car seat. The last time that happened in the morning? Before he was a year old at least!!!

When I dropped him off at daycare,he even stayed asleep!!

Party Pics...

In no particular order I have Party Pics from the bday. I don't know why my pictures show up in my layout all wonky, but oh well. I hope they work for you!

The table set up.

The cakes and cupcakes. They TOTALLY rocked.

eating his own personal cake. Yum!!!

Why use your hands when you can just stick your face in the cake?

A family picture with a no-so-cooperative 2 year old.

Emma's subway art

My favorite picture of the day, courtesy of Jennie. I LOVE the budda belly!

Mickey and Minnie Oreos!

This is from the night before. Camden learned how to climb a fence.
They were SO cute!!

Kinley came dressed to the nines for the festivities!

More to come!!!